What a Surprise

I had recently started talking to my ex again, after 16 years apart, and things started getting serious.  He was going through a divorce and wanted to be with me again, so I decided to start my divorce as well.

There were almost 6 hours distance between us, and only being able to see him once every 2 weeks or so was killing me.  He said he it was killing him as well.  He wanted us to be together as soon as possible.  He wanted me to meet his kids, come visit his house, possibly move in when I felt comfortable enough and after my divorce was filed.  In the interim, he sent me the song, 'Far Away' from Nickelback, telling me that he was so sorry for all the time that we had missed, that he never had really loved his wife, and that this time was going to be so different.  That he couldn't stand to be away from me anymore, and to please come and be with him as soon as possible.

I ended up loving that song.  It seemed to sum up our relationship and pain so well.  I would put it on my MP3 player and listen to it at night, falling asleep to it, because it was so meaningful to me.

When I finally ended up coming to his house, there was a list of his songs that apparently he was keeping indefinitely and used on whomever it was convenient.  There were 4 songs on the list, and a printout of lyrics and guess what was on there?  'Far Away' by Nickelback.  Dated 8 months before we had even started talking again.  Then I knew the reasoning behind it.  Needless to say, it crushed me that he sent it to me and told me it meant so much to him, to us, and now, I can't listen to it anymore.  I know it's not for me. 

Not all music memories are good ones.